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Post by Admin on Oct 12, 2023 13:15:04 GMT
It's Friday  It's Friday, and I have to go to work here soon, just bleeding off the remainder of my before work time. I've gotta be careful what I eat out there, if not as in good of shape I'm in, I'd probably sick today. No telling the ingredients they sneak into foods now, all these chemicals, designed to make food look astatically pleasing to the eyes, are unnatural for the body. When it comes to profit, man knows no bounderies. Anyways, I've gotta bulldoze through one more day of BS... (Oh wait, I think today's Thursday..woh)
dizzy for a reason I suppose.
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Post by Admin on Jun 13, 2024 17:56:38 GMT
Drank last night, paying the price today, just now sitting up.
I have so much to do, assignments, writing a script and more, and I'm dumb enough to still allow drinking to get in the way and hog up large swaths of my creative time.
Then have to meet with a man, my suppossed 'mentor' tomorrow for some studio time....but we don't really like each other...clash of personalities, culture, perspective...I'm just starting not to like them, even dreamed of yelling at them last night.
Anyways, time just keeps flying by...no wonder I'm a failure, cause I waste so much time doing nothing.
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Post by Admin on Jul 4, 2024 14:56:13 GMT
It's Thursday  I got up, rode bike to Amazon locker, got packages, and rode back. I mean why drive such a short distance..the whole trip about 1 mile or more, maybe 1.5 Yesterday started off OK, as far as my outlook and mood went, but then, I don't know, took a downward turn at night. So now today, hoping to take that downward turn from yesterday and turn it into something better...and that will only be achieved if I accomplish stuff today. I think it's when I don't get stuff done, that I should, or feel I'm behind, that my mood can take a sudden dive. Usually beer solves that...just start drinking and after 3rd beer, could care the less...but when sober, no such 'mood tool'...reality is your only tool. 0------------------------------------0 Anyways, up now, it's late morning, and I do have stuff I can do and need to do that will keep me, my mind, and my body busy all day long and into the night. When I'm not drinking, there's really no need or excuse to shut down, other than to take a nap now and then. I get about 70% more out of my days when I'm sober.
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Post by Admin on Jul 5, 2024 1:30:42 GMT
One thing for sure about the 4th in da hood areas, and that is black folks, younger ones anyways, will be shooting and killing other black folks.
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Post by Admin on Jul 11, 2024 13:35:13 GMT
Thursday moments Just got back from working out, a bike ride, stretching, walking and slow jogging, all in one outing. Now, time to lay down again and reset the clock..biological clock. But actually, I feel pretty energized on the inside, I just don't know what to do with that energy yet. I've stopped drinking, as of late, so ye, energy levels are off the charts, but still have a long way to go. It's Thursday, I do believe.
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Post by Admin on Aug 8, 2024 23:02:42 GMT
I've been stuffed inside this room all day, sitting, laying down, sitting...I need to get out, but don't feel like doing that either....probably cause I drank last night, and have drank twice within a week...I know the pattern, and that pattern is when start drinking, it makes you crabby and not want to really step out of your home, unless to get more beer or booze. It's a bad cycle to fall into....and it never gets better on it's own, cause the worse you feel, the more you want to drink. Anyways, that being said...I tell ya, Adobe photo editor, what a mess, no wonder I never had no use for it, but it's what most professionals use...I hate it and find it way to complicated compared to Movavi photo editor, which is 10 times easier to use and you don't need hundreds of hours of tutorials to figure out how to use it. The people who designed Adobe are straight up dorks...dorks make things overly complex, it's just what dorks do. Anyways, it's Thursday alright. |
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Post by Admin on Sept 5, 2024 20:37:28 GMT
Not having the best day, as far as my mood goes Not having the best day, as far as my mood goes. I think it's alcohol related, even though haven't drank since Tuesday night, but when I did, I acted a fool, rode my bike while drunk, and talked smack to people on the streets. And I tried one of those flavored, super bad for you, beer type of drinks.Not sure what they put in that stuff, but it's not regular type of drunk.  This is the type of beer, that if really young, and drank at a party, you'd get so nutty, and if attractive you'd allow yourself to be molested, or you'd start acting a fool and get beat up. There's just something unsavory about flavored beer drinks...I think they add some extra ingredients to them. I had just one, but after drinking a few cans of normal beer, but still...I think it's still effecting my mood and outlook. ----------------------------- Anyways, at least I did workout earlier today, and felt paranoid while doing so, as if I were being watched and followed by the person I confronted on the streets on Tuesday night. Then I came back in my _____, just to show off, and started cursing, not at them, but while talking to them. So childish and immature of me, but like I said above, I think it was that flavored beer that just hit me in a weird way. I don't know if my life's path will ever get better, I seem to be my worst enemy at times, but it's all primarily do to just being so alone all the time. When in a relationship and feel loved, you tend to reel yourself in...but when accountable to no one, you can act a fool at times, especially if and when drinking or drunk. Wow, I've written a lot...have other things to do, so I'll end it here, for now.
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Post by Admin on Nov 14, 2024 23:39:20 GMT
Time to write up a current 'to do list' Time to write up a current and relevant 'to do list', or I'll waste the rest of the evening and night just spacing off, I'm good at spacing off...cause in reality I'm done with life, meaning I could just spend the rest of my days in seclusion, if only I were rich. I have no desire to be apart of greater society no more, but forced to do to income needs. When younger, always dreaming of just buying some spooky older house, large house, with like 3-4 stories, and lots of rooms to explore. Imaging being alone and night while stoned in such a place, oh the adventures. Why must I live in a state where weed is illegal (Florida)...not that that stops anyone from doing it...but I don't, cause if I ever get back into driving, they test you for that...but it's one reason why they can't find good drivers these days, cause many drivers want their weed, or TSB or whatever the residue is called that they sell in stores. Anyways, time to get busy on some tasks. I have plenty of energy, even though not feeling the best on the inside.
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